- LuckySXyd
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* 回复内容中包含的链接未经审核,可能存在风险,暂不予完整展示!英语笑话故事
He Won
Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That"s too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
他赢了
汤姆:约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗?
约翰尼:他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事儿?
约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了。
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I"d know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”
“一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You"re a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What"s the meaning of the word "Drunk", dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there"s only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉"字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest"s plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
好客
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上,先生。”那小男孩说。
英语小笑话
上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do you
know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著
性, 缩写正好是 Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的
一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是
A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟
能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了.
参考资料:http://zhidao.b***.com/question/48092303.html
- 豆豆staR
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1。Good Intentions
良好的心愿
One day a boy came to his teacher and said:" Teacher, pa wants to know if you like roast pig."
一天有个男孩去对他老师说:“老师,我爸想知道你是不是爱吃烤猪肉。”
"I certainly do," said the teacher, "and you tell your father he is very kind to think of me."
“当然罗,”老师说,“去告诉你父亲,多谢他想着我。”
Days passed, and nothing more was said about the roast pig.
好几天过去了,再没提起考猪肉的事儿。
Finally the teacher said to the boy:"I thought your father was going to send me over some roast pig."
最后老师对男孩说:“我以为你父亲要给我送点烤猪肉来呢。”
"Yes," said the boy, "he did intend to, but the pig sot well."
“是啊,”孩子说,“他是这么想的,可后来猪又没病了。”
2
Who Shot Abraham Lincoln
Mr. Smith and his son Rick were called to teacher "s classroom.
“ Mr. Smith, ” said the teacher, “ I asked Rick "Who shot Abraham Lincoln?" and he said that he didn"t do it! ”
“ Well, teacher, ” said Smith, “ if my kid said he didn"t do it — he didn"t do it! ” Father and son left the school, and on their way home, Smith turned to the boy and asked, “ Tell me, son, did you do it? ”
谁枪杀了阿拉伯罕·林肯
史密斯 先生和他的儿子瑞克被请进老师办公室。
“ 史密斯 先生,”老师说,“我问瑞克‘谁枪杀了阿拉伯罕·林肯?"他说不是他干的!”
“嗯,老师,” 史密斯说,“如果我的孩子说不是他干的,——那就不是他干的!”父亲与儿子离开学校,在回家的路上,史密斯问儿子:“告诉我,儿子,是你干的吗?”
- 大鱼炖火锅
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寒假是coming.We "重新高兴地欢迎holidays.Usually ,寒假是有趣的,因为春节是在度假。
春节是一个极好的每一天中,特别是对children.During节,亲戚去访问,给对方提出的每个other.Then这是高兴的时刻,儿童得到一些压岁钱。
但我不是一个孩子任何longer.I希望使节有点不同。我计划有不同的day.I "米打算卖掉一些玩具花market.I会问我的朋友加入me.If获利一些钱,我要买一些给我parents.Well ,这是我的反过来返还给我的父母为他们的爱情。
- 皮皮
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寒假来了.我们高兴地欢迎假期.通常 ,寒假是有趣的,因为春节是在度假。
春节是一个极好的每一天中,特别是对儿童节.During节,亲戚去访问,给对方提出的每个other.这是高兴的时刻,儿童得到一些压岁钱。
但我不是一个孩子任何longer.I希望使节有点不同。我计划有不同的天.I "米打算在市场卖掉一些玩具花.我会问我的朋友加入me.If获利一些钱,我要买一些给我父母.Well ,这是我的反过来返还给我的父母为他们的爱情。