Look at all the corruption that's going on.It's time the cit

Individualism:Free From Corruption
In Oscar Wilde’s philosophical novel （“）The Picture of Dorian Gray（”）,the most salient and significant feature is the （advocacy） of individualism which is （shown oppositely） by the negative consequences of Lord Henry’s influence （towards） the main character Dorian Gray.In the beginning of the novel,during a conversation between the painter Basil Hallward and his friend Lord Henry Wotton,Basil introduces Dorian as a good-natured,innocent young man.However,as innocent as Dorian is,he is vulnerable to Lord Henry’s negative influences.(Dorian's vulnerable nature is clearly represented as he) stares at his beautiful portrait and utters:“If it were I who was to be always young,and the picture that was to grow old!I would give my soul for that”(29) after hearing Lord Henry’s enchanting speech about the significance of youth and beauty.It is clear that Dorian is allured by Lord Henry’s philosophy of Hedonism,and starts to value beauty more than morality.From this point on,Dorian gradually loses his conscience and views the main goal of life as to “search for new sensations” (149) and pleasure,which is the theme of the yellow book that Lord Henry gives to Dorian.Dorian’s unrestricted speeches and actions lead to the suicide of the young actress Sibyl Vane and the murder of Basil.Eventually,Dorian begins to (despise) his evil transformation and (is appalled) by the decay of his own soul; (as a result)he stabs his portrait and kills himself.In this heartbreaking tragedy,Wilde (efficiently) depicts how Dorian’s credulous nature causes his destruction.Furthermore,Wilde illustrates the importance of having individuality and （the determination to resist corruption) by outside influences.(The) value of individualism (within the novel explains) the idea of transcendentalism in which people need to rely and trust themselves and be free from corruption and outside influences.
句子结构挺专业的.写的不错!以上只是个人建议

完全正确的. 你的疑问应该在于 debilitated 吧, 你在不知不觉中使用了修辞手法（personification)